NOW YOU KNOW.

My house was full of corpses!

This is how it started:

I was outside chit chatting with my friends. We were teasing Tracy on how chubbier she’d gotten over the holiday. She kept denying it, looking at the mirror, gurgling air then loosing it. Giggles. More giggles. I had enough of that, so I left the girls for an evening nap. “People” say that afternoon naps make someone prettier- a sleeping beauty. Anyway, that’s merely consoling myself for being lazy and not setting my hands to do a better task.

I noticed that I’d placed my “WELCOME” doormat upside down but was too lazy to adjust it. I was halfway through the door when something caught my attention. I had left the fish on the table and wasn’t done scaling it. I lazily picked the knife up and resumed the scaling.

You know how people curve their names on a tree during a date. Poor trees. It’s surprising how people carry knives on a date though. If you’re thinking I’m out of topic you’re wrong. That was a story about a knife and I was holding one in my hand while scaling the fish. Now clearly those two knives- though from different dish racks- are still in the same family. Same species, I believe. Okay, break is over!

I must’ve been thinking about that when I decided to take a nap on the sofa. I’m not sure that I washed my hands off fish guts but that’s what people with guts in life do- another consolation for being lazy. I slept in fish guts- that reminds me of Jonah and the big fish. Sorry people, let’s get our minds back to the fish in my kitchen and the guts on my hands.

The next thing I remember was a buzzing noise. I turned over and I felt something on my face. Something small and destructive. Noisy, annoying, loud, aggravating, persistent, irritating, and awakening! It woke me up, but my eyes were still closed, I tried opening them, till I had to. I could not believe my eyes, so I closed them again. Too bad my ears were still open so I could neither ignore the nuisance nor turn a blind eye anymore.

If you’ve watched the movie “Snakes on the Plane” you wouldn’t have a clue of  what “Flies in the Room” was about except for that they both fly. Flies on the table, flies on the fish, flies everywhere. It dawned on me that I’d left the door open and all the flies in the neighbourhood were having a par-tey🙌💃💫. They probably thought I was on a sleepover at one of their folks invite.

I ran out to my next door neighbour who has insect repellent- I should probably get one too. I will someday- when I grow up. Pssssshhh! Pssssshhh! Pssssshhh! Pssssshhh! One more last time- pssssshhh!

My house was full of corpses!

Lesson: Don’t be fishy.🐟